


turning page

by prettyluke (buttonjimin)



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: DADDY LASHTON, Fluff, M/M, domestic lashton, they have their first child and they cannot believe how precious their little baby is, this is the cutest thing i have ever written
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-08
Updated: 2015-07-08
Packaged: 2018-04-08 07:09:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4295370
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/buttonjimin/pseuds/prettyluke
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>luke and ashton never thought they would get to have a child, but it's something more beautiful and breathtaking than they could ever have imagined.</p><p>title from turning page by sleeping at last.</p>
            </blockquote>





	turning page

**Author's Note:**

> listen to the song turning page by sleeping at last while you read this. this is all naomi's fault and you can blame her

If someone had told them when they were teenagers, before the band was even going anywhere, when Ashton stood up for Luke at the movies, they would have never been able to believe it. It was such an out of reach concept for them, just 17 and 15 years old, practically children, still stealing sloppy secret kisses in the back seat of Ashton’s car and pretending that what they had was just a teenage fantasy taken from a crappy romance movie.

When the band took off, and Calum and Michael realized that they always roomed and that the very occasional situation of being kept up by the bedframe slamming up against shared walls never included groupies, and that they always seemed to walk in on them still tangled in bed with Luke’s forehead on Ashton’s chest and Ashton’s hand in his hair, something so loving and sweet and natural, they could have guessed—they could have imagined. But they were young, they were still learning about each other, and there’s no room to do the things normal couples do. It wasn’t the same; most couples were in college, getting jobs and storing away money in the banks to someday pay for a house and a family, and they were off playing shows every night with the pounding guitars and percussion ringing in their ears for hours after, even while they curled up under foreign hotel sheets. And if they were so in love it hurt to breathe sometimes, it didn’t matter, because the tabloids could never find out, would never be able to twist it or turn them into something they weren’t.

But when they were all well into their twenties, Ashton breaching early thirties, they couldn’t live that way anymore, couldn’t pretend that they were still teenagers. The magic, the novelty of a new career and the discovery of life as young celebrities had long faded, and they all finally came back to Sydney to start a new chapter of their lives.

For Michael and Calum, it meant reuniting with their families and resuming the normal life that they’d missed out on for some fourteen odd years. Michael settled his parents in a comfortable retirement home, found a girlfriend, and kept to himself, because after so long in the media, he most of all was glad for a private life. Calum started up an organization in partnership with TWLOHA to teach kids music and how to use it to heal themselves, in a way Calum had been able to do with himself. It was all Calum wanted to do, to pass on what he’d learned along the way to people who could use it for more good than he ever could.

Luke and Ashton finally came out to the media, resolving years of tensions and suspicions among fans and badly written Sugarscape conspiracy articles. But they weren’t in a band anymore—they were just two men, and when all the buzz died down, they married each other under the sun and before their families and closest friends, and then they were free to start a new life together.

And after that, if you had told them they would get to have a child together, they still would have found it hard to believe, that after so many years of keeping things under wraps while the spotlight was on, they would be able to do something so monumental in the face of their new marriage.

It wasn’t something they considered until one night a year later, when they were going to sleep, Ashton whispered, _Do you want to start a family?_ And Luke had rolled over and buried his face in Ashton’s chest, whispering, _Yes, yes, yes, yes_ and kissing him everywhere he could reach.

So they took it slow; they didn’t tell anybody, for fear their planning would come to nothing. There were options, finding a surrogate mother or adoption, and they both understood the merits of both. If they adopted, they would be providing a life for a child who might otherwise never see happiness and family. But surrogacy meant a child that was theirs, that was their blood and would grow up to look like one of them. And as much as they tried, they couldn’t get that idea out of their head.

It was exciting, knowing their child was out there. Getting updates, ultrasound results, hearing _normal, everything’s fine_ and feeling that wave of relief every time. It was Luke’s idea to keep the gender a secret, because he stipulated that there would be some time before they got to take the child home, and in that time they could buy all the gendered items they would need.

They did what they could in the nine months anyway; they bought a crib with Winnie the Pooh, a standard white thing that they placed in their bedroom, dreaming every night that someday there would be a child of their own sleeping inside. They prepared a room to be the nursery, filling it with toys and stuffed animals and one of those baby bouncers Luke thought was _just so adorable_ , and bottles and pacifiers and everything. They painted the walls a soft yellow and paid someone to paint little Winnie the Pooh characters all over the wall. Calum and Michael had the misfortune of getting dragged along to quite a few baby shopping trips.

And then, finally, the due date drew near.

 

* * *

 

They don’t want to be in the delivery room for the purpose of easing any discomfort their surrogate mother might find with their presence, so they stay up all night in the hospital lobby, holding hands, waiting, buzzing and nearly sick with the knowledge that their child, boy or girl, could be somewhere in this hospital at any given moment. As soon as the child is checked and given standard post-birth procedures, they’ll be able to see it, and sign the birth certificate. Calum and Michael are there too, although they don’t have to be. Even their parents aren’t there.

“I can hardly breathe,” Luke says to Ashton, knee bouncing next to him. “I can’t wait.”

“It’ll be soon,” Ashton says, wrapping an arm around him and letting him lean his head on his shoulder. “Promise, babe.” He kisses Luke’s forehead, the rush of excitement washing over him.

“I’m so excited for you guys,” Michael bursts out, unable to contain himself. “I never would have thought—I never guessed I would get to see you guys have a kid.”

Calum grins, clearly not quite as nervous as Luke and Ashton. “I can’t believe it either. Seems like yesterday we were walking in on you guys in bed together.”

It’s terribly charged in the lobby, the excited energy flowing off of everyone. They all understand the awful magnitude of tonight, just how close they are to being fathers and uncles alike. Everything is going to change.

Luke is sure he's going to explode, Ashton is sure he’ll have to go to the bathroom and calm himself down, but just past midnight, a nurse finally emerges from the quiet halls and says that they can see their child.

They scramble to their feet. Luke is gripping Ashton’s hand so tightly he thinks his circulation is going to stop, even if his heart is pumping blood at a million miles an hour.

“Oh my god,” Ashton hears himself say. “Is it a boy? Is it a girl?”

The nurse smiles. “It’s a girl,” she says, and Calum and Michael groan. Ashton’s knees are wobbly, ready to buckle, and Luke bites down hard on his lip and tries not to be overwhelmed by the simple piece of information. They’re shaking, hand in hand, as they follow the nurse down the hallway.

She takes them into the room with the incubators, all those babies lined up. Ashton whispers to Luke, scared, “I wonder which one’s ours.”

Luke doesn’t answer, clinging tight to him. The air is heavy in everyone’s throats.

Finally, the nurse lifts a baby from a far corner, cradling her in her swaddle of blankets and bringing her to where Luke and Ashton stand out in the hallway. Luke inhales sharply, and Ashton thinks he’s going to cry, so he swallows hard.

“Can I hold her?” Luke whispers, his voice choked. He’s trembling, visibly so as he reaches for the child.

The nurse smiles. “Hold your arms out for me. You have to support her head. Hold her close, now.”

She sets the baby in his arms and Luke brings the baby to his chest, and that’s when he starts to cry, little tears that splash onto her blankets. Ashton huddles close, touching her cheek and withdrawing his finger, afraid to hurt her.

“She’s so small,” Luke chokes out, with a little laugh and a sniffle.

“She’s five pounds, fourteen ounces,” the nurse says with a reassuring smile. “She’s tiny, but she’s perfectly healthy.”

“Oh my god,” Ashton whispers. “I’m a dad.”

“We’re dads,” Luke mumbles, his breath shuddery. He can’t stop smiling, crying. “We’re going to be dads.”

Ashton strokes her forehead, marveling. Tiny lips, tiny shut eyes, tiny nose. He doesn’t realize he’s crying too until he feels the dampness of it on his cheeks. “I never thought,” he whispers thickly, “that we would get to—to care for something so, so _beautiful_.” He kisses her forehead, unable to form more words.

“Oh god,” Luke says, crying harder. “Oh my god. She’s so small, she’s so lovely.” He holds her like she’ll break, so afraid.

“Can I hold her?” Ashton asks, about to start sobbing at any second. Luke nods and puts her in Ashton’s arms. Ashton rocks her gently, remembering (he’s not sure how, given his shock) how he used to do it when Lauren and Harry were babies. She’s smaller, more fragile, and he feels the weight of the world upon him. He’s so in love with this tiny bundle in his arms, the realization that he has a responsibility to love her and care for her and raise her. He’s going to keep her safe, but she’s so _small_ , and he can’t believe his own eyes.

Woken by the commotion, she opens her eyes, and Luke gasps. They’re baby blue, piercing, and he touches the front of her blankets. She makes a tiny little gurgling noise, and Michael starts to cry in the back. A quick look back confirms Calum’s succumbed to waterworks as well.

Ashton puts her back in Luke’s arms, because Luke looks so taken with her, and he’s equally afraid to drop her, but he doesn’t once take his eyes off her. “I love her so much,” Luke says fiercely, tears still falling. Ashton puts his arms around Luke and his new baby girl. “I love _you_ so much.”

Ashton kisses Luke’s cheek, kisses her cheek, and oh my god, he can’t breathe. “We’re going to be dads,” he repeats again. “We’re a family now.”

Luke laughs, choked and happy, and echoes it back. “We’re a family now.”

**Author's Note:**

> there you have it are you in tears? bc i am i did not proofread this i wrote this in like half an hour but it is everything


End file.
